next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Randomize
