I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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