I didn't shave. On purpose
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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