On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
