why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
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