I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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