pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
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