I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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