I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Just invented taco cereal.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
