she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I'm really busy with my period
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