Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
