do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
