Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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