yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
And then he peed in my hair
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