Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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