Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
