the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!