Im at strip club and am horny
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize