just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
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then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
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We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
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