break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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