a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Randomize