I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
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