First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
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