your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
