I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize