Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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