its not stalking. its research.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
