I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
