So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize