i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Randomize
