Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
