I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
porn star boner night. come get it.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
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