Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
