Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
