Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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