I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
