Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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