Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
