we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Randomize