i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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