Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize