You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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