Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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