She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
He is an equal opportunity slut.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
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after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
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And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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