her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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