I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
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