are you so shy because you have an std?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
