why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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