The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
