If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!