you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
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It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
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don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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